Switching Seats

"Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat; I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to saving yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you? What could you ever trade your soul for?” ~ Jesus (Mark 8:36 MSG)

I have run red lights, drove over curbs and slammed on my brakes too many times to count. I have driven beyond the speed limit, paid for tickets in which I was at fault, and rear-ended the innocent. I have missed a turn more times then I'd like to admit, gotten leg cramps on long trips, and found myself completely lost in unknown cities, all while behind the steering wheel of my vehicle.

As much as I enjoy driving, these instances would show that I'm not all that good at it.

As relaxing as driving can be, after sitting in one place for long periods of time, it can become exhausting. There does come a point where your body starts to tense up, things turn uncomfortable and you need to pull off to the side of the road for a break. A rest. A stretch.

You simply get tired.

In life, it is the same.

We need a driver who never grows weary or faint.

A driver who will always steer us in the direction we are to go.

The good news is that Jesus is already in the driver's seat and He wants to lead us.

But we are really good at white-knuckling the steering-wheel because there are so many things we want to see, places we want to go, and lands we want to explore, but for some reason we get stalled. At a stand still. As though something needs to be fixed.

In those times, it is easy for us to get frustrated or impatient, but God knows what He is doing.
We can trust Him.

He wants to consume us with the good news of grace and guide us through this life, no matter what the traveling conditions might be. He wants to fuel us.

Remembering who we are or where we've come from is one of the hardest things we do.

It often brings us back to places we thought we could leave behind for good.

God doesn't want us to drive in the opposite direction of discomfort or suffering. He tells us to embrace it.

Too often we try to control the truth.

But God already knows and He wants to bring us into a true freedom. God wants to release us from the heavy loads of luggage we travel with.

It can be hard to hand over the driver's seat and lay down control, to let someone show you a better way.

We fight through this life with many inadequacies and we frequently get hurt.

God wants to be in the driver's seat to lead you in love.

Knowing that because Jesus loved us, He died for us, and we can be forgiven... that clears any accusation about past destinations and cleans up the baggage.

When God guides, it is the road to freedom we travel. A road to true healing.

The world and all its self-help methods cannot help us at our greatest need.

This expedition is not one we need to be afraid of but one we can joyfully celebrate.

Navigation belongs to our Sovereign God.

Jesus is calling the crowds to Himself, let us move on over and let Him drive...

Life is like a... triathlon?

I was almost there.  I knew once I turned that corner I would see the finish line, hear the cheers of my fellow racers and the oh-so coveted 'binging' sound of my timing chip announcing that I was finished as I crossed the final timing mat and the rush of emotions of having completed the challenge would overtake me.

Triathlon number one of the season would be complete.

Back up a second... Triathlon?  Yup, I had to do a double take too.  Don't be mistaken, I am no athlete. Never have been.  But for the last few years I have been pushing myself into new territory. And this is definitely new territory.

Every time I compete, that would be three so far, I can't help but connect this life's journey to that of the adventure of completing a triathlon. For those of you who are not familiar with what a triathlon is, it is a sporting event where you swim laps, ride a bike and then run all in continuity.

So HOW does a triathlon equate to life?  I see it like this.


Life brings us to different stages and each stage has it's own challenges and it's own joys. Each athlete in a triathlon event has their strong suit and their weakness - ask anyone who has done a triathlon and they will tell you which is which for them.  For me, swimming is my strength, which is a whole other posting, and running is my supreme weakness.  But as I am swimming I am not thinking about my run and how hard it is going to be - I would give up before I even got started!  I focus on the task at hand, stroke by stroke, pedal by pedal and step by step.





Life is the same isn't it?  Thinking too far ahead can cause us to feel overwhelmed by what is coming up.  Focus on the part your in.  That might be year by year for you. It might be month by month, week by week or day by day and still others are in a part of their journey that they can only focus hour by hour.





I don't know if right now you are in the strength of your event, or perhaps you are struggling through the weakness; but I encourage you to keep going because soon you are going to hear the sound of the crowd cheering you on as you cross that finish line.  You see, God has a marvellous finishing for us. He is busy building a place for us to live with Him eternally.  And each leg of this life race is bringing you closer, preparing you to cross that finish and you may not hear the binging of a timing chip, but you will hear a voice, God's voice, as he says to you, "Well done."


                           "Let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us."

Making This Temple Worthy

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy spirit, who is in you, who you have received from God? You are not your own, you were bought at a price. Therefore, honour God with your body."

I am out of shape. I mean, really. I avoid a lot of things that make me uncomfortable (both emotionally and physically) but I have a real love of outdoors and this pushes me outside, immersing myself in God's creation. My parents liked camping and took us kids out into the 'wilderness' on a regular basis. Most of the vacations in my childhood were camping vacations and we loved it. All of my siblings are nature nuts and frequently escape into the great outdoors.

With my sister's encouragement, I took my first backpacking trip last summer. I was quite overweight, but somewhat in shape because of all the walking I had done in the months leading up to the hike. When the time came for our hike, I was sick with a cold and allergies, complicated by asthma, and honestly, the hike was extremely hard for me. My sister offered to let me drop my pack and she would come back for it later, but I was determined to finish and to finish with everything I had brought, so I stubbornly persisted. It took everything I had to make it to our campsite. I remember wondering how I would make it back to the beginning the next day. I was so surprised that after a decent sleep, I was ready to go again in the morning for the trek back.

So it was with that memory in mind that we started off on a backpacking trip a couple weeks ago. I had planned to get into better shape before hand, but with my sedentary job and virtually no will-power, I am currently at the heaviest I've ever been (hard to admit, but there ya go) and very out of shape. I haven't exactly been careful of the temple I've been bestowed, if you know what I mean. I debated postponing or calling off the hike, but decided to go for my son's sake.

The first day was not too bad. Admittedly, I developed a blister only 3 kilometers into the hike, and I was slower than my fellow hikers, but I had fairly decent energy and kept up the pace all the way to our destination. I felt pretty good that evening and realized how hard being sick made the hike last year. But I was tired and a bit sore and was counting on feeling good to go in the morning after a night's sleep.

I shouldn't have counted on that. I didn't sleep well. I was cold. I was stiff and sore when I woke up and it didn't get better. I was walking funny because of the pain of my blister, and that made my legs tired and sore. I developed a new blister on my other heel and I was slow. The walk back was miserable and I felt bad for slowing everyone down (we had to stick together because we were in bear country and we saw signs). With frequent rest breaks for me, we made it back and I was filled with not only the desire to work harder on getting into shape, but also with amazement at the miracle of my body.

I know, right? It surprised me too.

I haven't been taking care of my body at all, and I gave it a real beating on that mountain hike. We had to slog through muck, navigate puddles, trip over wet roots, climb over and crawl under fallen trees, all with heavy packs on our backs and often while singing to keep the bears away, and I made it. After one of our rest breaks, my son noticed I was trembling. My muscles had almost given up, but I kept pushing and my body forgave me and worked continuously until I could gratefully relax. It kept going like the energizer bunny and it truly amazed me. My sister said something that stuck with me. "Our bodies are made for work." Imagine what this body could be capable of with a little bit of work?

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know this full well."

Struggling for Significance

Struggling for Significance.

Have you ever felt that you just don't measure up?

As a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom, I often have times when I question whether what I do on a daily basis has value. I struggle with my identity in a culture where women are not just moms, they are moms and something else. Usually something that also earns them money. Stay-at-home mom's are a dying breed.

When I feel like this I am really searching for significance. Do I matter?

Does anyone care that all the socks match and there's food in the fridge? Do my kids even notice that I spent half my day driving them places? Is there anyone who won't argue with my requests or correction? Does what I do matter?

When I feel like this, it is important to stop my wrong thought processes. Instead of seeing my life through society's filter of success, I need to see it from God's perspective. He sees everything, and so He notices what I do, even when no one else seems to. He loves my children even more than I do, and He cares how they are treated and cared for. To Him they are are immensely valuable. To Him, I have great worth.

But it matters, not so much what I'm doing, for even changing diapers can have eternal significance if I do it with the right attitude. There are some verses in the Bible which specifically talk about this:

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. (Colossians 3:23-25, NIV)

I need to remember that even though I'm working for the benefit of my husband and children, ultimately I am not working for people's praise, or even my children's gratitude, but to bring honour to God, for He is the one who will ultimately reward me, if not in this life, then in the one to come. I also need to remember that I am blessed to be able to stay at home, and that there are a lot of working moms out there that would rather be in my place.

So if you ever question whether you are significant, know that you are, and that what you are doing is important in God's sight.

Pillars of Smoke

On a street in an older part of a city, a couple decided their house needed a new look. Having little experience with renovating themselves, they saved their pennies and then eagerly flipped through the yellow pages until they found a renovating company that they could afford.

Their excitement grew when large trucks pulled up to their house. The renovation would take a few weeks, but the couple was willing to wait and anticipated their house looking new and modern.

One afternoon when the couple was away several men were working on tearing up flooring. One of the men, getting sick of the dusty work, announced to his co-worker he needed to step out for a smoke.

A few minutes later her was loitering the front of the house.

He threw his cigarette butt on the ground and went to return to his work.

He failed to step on the remains of the cigarette.

A spark started some scrap on fire. The little flame steadily grew, and then reached the front deck. The rest happened like dominoes, until the house was engulfed in violent flames.

The two men rushed outside, coughing through the smoke and staring at the pillars of thick blackness tunneling their way into the sky.

Imagine being that worker. Imagine staring at those pillars of smoke. Imagine feeling the heat from the fire. Imagine knowing you'd just made one of the simplest but biggest mistakes ever.

Imagine thinking about all those pillars of smoke meant. Imagine knowing everyhting you've just ruined.

You've ruined your life. You know you'll be fired for this mistake.

You've ruined your family's lives. They need your income to eat, to survive. Who will put bread on the able now?

You've ruined your boss' life. How can he ever get customers if his company starts home fires?

You've ruined the couples' lives. They were relying on you, and now their home, no doubt filled with precious objects of great sentiment, was lost in those pillars of smoke.

Imagine knowing you've ruined everything. That's what those pillars of smoke meant - that you've ruined absolutely everything.

Let's face it: we've all seen those pillars of smoke to one degree or another. We've all made a mistake that not only effected us, but also made life miserable for those we love and those who are relying on us. When we get caught in this situation, guilt gnaws away at us deep down. We feel terrible about everything, and no matter how we try to justify our actions, our conscience has issued us to a living death sentence.

We feel the eyes of everyone around us accusing us, unwilling to forgive. The last thing we want is another set of those accusing eyes. The last thing we want is someone else to complain about how horrible we've made life for them.

The last place we want to be is in God's presence.

We think God will be another set of condemning eyes. We think he's ready to whip out the rule book and slam us in the face. So we avoid God, crawling in our own guilt while the voices in our mind slowly eat away at our hearts.

But God's presence is exactly the place we need to be. Although God is a God of justice, he is also a God of grace. He doesn't want us to live in the misery of guilt. God doesn't intend for us to hate the life that he's given to us. God wants to set us free from the guilt that enslaves us.

When we enter God's presence, truly sorry for our actions, he'll forgive us. And once he's forgiven us, he sees us as blameless. There's no strings attached. He's willing to take upon himself the guilt of our mistakes. We don't have to carry it around as a burden. We still have consequences from the people around us, but they are much easier to deal with once the accusing voices in our mind have been wiped away.

God doesn't enslave us to guilt. God sets us free from guilt. Whenever we're staring in those pillars of smoke, thinking about how we've ruined everything, we need to remember that we need to go to God. We need to let him set us free from guilt.

Pillars of smoke can set our lives on fire, but God can dose those flames in his mercy.

Uncontainable JOY

The last little while on my facebook profile page I have been listing my 100 favourite things. Just this past Sunday I knew that sitting and watching America's Funniest Home Videos with my kids had to make the list.

I barely watch the show. I catch a video once in awhile and laugh, but no matter where I am in the house, I am still drawn to come and sit with my three little men because of their contagious laughter. I watch their eyes sparkle as they cackle, I love the sound of their hands hitting their legs when the laughter itself isn't enough and I love the looks they give each other, like 'can you believe that?'.

Indisputable Joy.
Uninterrupted Joy.
Innocent Joy.
Timeless Joy.
Precious Joy.
Contagious Joy.
Uncontainable Joy.

Who doesn't want to be found in the midst of joy like that?

I love it when people say, "if we could bottle that stuff and sell it we'd make a fortune". Wouldn't it be great to have a bottle of joy you could just open when you needed a pick me up? I am convinced that stuff would go flying off the shelves. I am certain that Costco would have an entire aisle of bulk stock in a heart beat and it would be gone equally fast.

So here is the thing about joy. It isn't bottled. It isn't random. It is available. To you. Today. For Free. If I could post a link here that said - FREE JOY - I bet we'd have a thousand hits within minutes.

Do you know where that link would take you?

Straight to the heart of God. He is joy. He created you with joy. He saved you with joy. And he loves you with joy. He wants to and is ready to offer you that joy. You can have an endless supply in your life...

All you need to do is invite the source of all joy into your life. It is as simple as asking God to come and be in your life. He will not turn you away, his word, the bible assures that 'if you seek, you shall find'. Ask God how to find him - he will show you.

What are you waiting for - Joy is waiting for you.

To learn more about how to know God, you really can click here:)

Offer your Pieces

I'm not going to hold back. I'm going to share with you what I know.
No lies. You ready? Here it is....

YOU are BROKEN.
I am BROKEN.

And we are in need of a remedy beyond what we can do with human hands.

We need the true healer. A redeemer of our wounded hearts.

For years, I held it together. I was strong. I was glue. I was the backbone.

I hid my pain well, because I thought I was alone in it. I thought if people knew the real me, they wouldn't understand or show me the compassion my heart yearned for.

I thought if God was to love me I needed to be good enough for Him.

I hid. I lived covered. I piled my days busy with tasks, to-do's, and relationships that were hallow. I played my roles of "good mother", "good wife", "good friend", and "good Christian woman".

Meanwhile, I was being torn up inside. Wrestling with hurts that still oozed. Struggles and fears that ruled me and I didn't know what to do with them, besides keep them inside. Hidden away from others.

Until one day...

"God made my life complete
when I placed all the pieces before him.
I feel put back together,
and I'm watching my step.
God rewrote the text of my life
when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes."

Psalm 18:20,23-24

Are you feeling alone? Beaten-down? Hopeless?

Are you needing to find healing?

Desperate for wholeness?

Place the pieces of your life, all of them, into the hands of God.

He is open to them. He wants to see them. Nothing you have to say or bring is too much for Him.

You can lay your pieces down before Him by simply speaking genuinely to Him, taking them out of hiding and giving them over to him.

Those pieces are an offering to Him. He delights in receiving you.

God has shown me, that life isn't meant to be lived alone. Self-reliant.
Rather, dependant on His never-ceasing love and grace.
He wants you. As you are. Broken. In-need. Of Him.

We are incapable of changing our own hearts. It is His work.
A work that Jesus joyfully wants to do in you.
Since Jesus has worked FOR US, we must rest in Him.
A most freeing imperative, indeed.

We are BROKEN. He is LIFE.
God uses our brokenness as one of the windows through which we see His face.

So grab my hand... let us reach together & place our shattered pieces at His feet. You are NOT alone.

"We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith." Hebrews 12:2

Looking In...

It started as I drove into town for my Monday morning workout – I began looking in.

Music has a way of doing that to me.

God has a way of doing that to me.

‘Beautiful’ was the song playing on my i-pod. I listen to it like someone with O.C.D rubs a disinfectant rhythmically and consistently over their hands until they feel like it works, hoping the words will leap out of the music and sink into my heart, until they become a part of me, until they become what I truly believe, until I really know it’s in there…

Once I was getting out of my car and walking into the fitness studio, I knew it was going to be more than a physical work out – just me and my coach – always a prime opportunity for great talks and coaching each other on what is going on in our lives.

I told her that the drive over had already began lending some insight into my physical "road block' this morning. She asked me questions that I knew were coming from somewhere much deeper; I immediately felt the pang of the working of my inner spiritual and belief muscles, as I pumped away at my physical ones.

Have you ever worked out your eye sockets? I have – holding back tears is tuff work.

Once I was home again I caught a post on a friend’s blog that brought me back to those studio conversations. Her words began to encourage me to walk in what I was feeling, to explore it -don’t pack it away. I felt moved to seek God on the issue. In the writing I uncovered a hint of the purpose behind what I was going to have to walk through. And as I was reading I heard in my heart the words, “this is the way, my way …walk in it”

I went to hear a motivational Christian speaker, Grace Fox, just the other night with some friends. And as these conversations from my day were happening the speakers words came back to me…

time to move from fear and step into freedom…

learn to clothe myself with strength and dignity…

it is this journey that makes me stronger, not my strength that helps me make the journey…

faith is meant for everyone - including me.

I did a part of my workout attempting to look in the mirror - something I never do. Looking in the mirror is one exercise I cannot seem to find the will to try and I certainly can't seem to master. As I was looking I began to search my face, my body, my eyes for what others see, for what God sees. He wants to show me what is there of value, what others see, what He sees as beautiful.

But first I need to dare to look up and see it and then choose to believe it…

My Father

My Father

"Which of you fathers, if your son [or daughter]
asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead?"

As Father's Day comes closer, I look back on how I viewed my father when I was a child. It is not a pretty picture:

My father was a pillar of the community: just not behind our closed doors.
Quick to judge: my father was often angry.
Heavy-handed: we kids were frequently unjustly punished, both physically and emotionally.
Conflictual: my father argued endlessly with my mother. They finally divorced.
Looking for love: my father abused me.

As a teenager, I walked away.

Many years passed by.



Shortly after I married, I walked back into my father's life. Neither of us was the same person we had been in my childhood. Much had happened in the interim:

I learned how to talk to God, saying: "Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name..."

I came to know that I could forgive my father his wrongdoings, since Jesus had saved me from from my own, by dying on the cross.
I let go of my anger and shame so that it no longer had a hold on me.
I confronted my father and knew that he had changed.

My father, also, learned a lot during our years apart. He was no longer the man I feared. He was no longer the man I had grown up with:

He married a wonderful, giving woman who encouraged him to be all that he was meant to be.
He was remorseful, kind and loving in the truest sense of that word.
He became a terrific Grandpa, even so far as traveling to attend my children's graduations.
He came to know what it meant to be a friend.

As Father's Day approaches, I choose not to look at the past. My childhood is gone now, as are my teen and young adult years. I am well into middle-age and loving it.

No, I will not look back.

Instead,

I look forward to celebrating the joy I find in God, my Father in heaven.

And...

I can't wait to pick up the phone, dial the number and say,

"Happy Father's Day, Dad!"